Lesson 2 Communication Across CulturesText A Misunderstanding Other CulturesThere is a folk tale that comes to us from the foothills of the Himalayas. A man was trying to explain to a blind friend what colors are. He began with the color white.“Well,” he said, “it is like snow on the hills.”“Oh,” the blind man said, “then it must be a wet and dampish sort of color, isnt it? No, no,” the man said, “it is also the same color as cotton or wool.”“Oh yes, I understand. It must be a fluffy color.”“No, it is also like paper.”“Then it must be a crackling or fragile color,” said the blind man. “No, not at all. It is also like china.”It is very difficult for people to understand one another if they do not share the same experiences. Of course, we all share the experience of being human, but there are many experiences which we do not share and which are different for all of us. It is these different experiences that make up what is called “culture” in the social sciences the habits of everyday life, the cues to which people respond, the automatic reactions they have to whatever they see and hear. These often differ, and the differences may induce misunderstandings where we seek understanding.At the very beginning of a cultural exchange program, a French visitor came to the United States. He said to an American friend, “Why arent you Americans more frank with us?”The American said, “Why? What do you mean?”The Frenchman said, “You tell us that you are for free enterprise, but I have been traveling throughout the United States and I have seen that practically all the production all the plants and factories are nationalized.”The Frenchmans assumption arose from the fact that in France only buildings belonging to the French government fly the French flag. What the Frenchman analyzed was not the immediate perception. He analyzed the economic system, and what he saw he evaluated in his own way.Misinterpretations of this type can take place at a variety of levels. They can take place at the level of understanding, at the level of ideas or values, and sometimes at the level of feelings. The most serious are those that take place at the level of feelings. Very often misunderstandings at this level come not from ill will, but from good will. Sometimes we hurt another persons feelings without wanting to do it and without knowing that we are doing it.Here is an example. A young Japanese student came to the United States, and he was overwhelmed by the cordial reception he was given. He said, “The American people are wonderful. They are so warm, so friendly much beyond my expectations.”Some time later it was told that while traveling in the West, this same young man had had dinner with an American family and had remarked that he greatly admired the countrys efficiency, organization, and accomplishment. But, he said, there was one thing he would never quite understand, and that was why Americans were so cold, so distant. His host was deeply hurt, and the visit ended on a bit of a sour note.The point here is that both the first and last statements by the young man are typical. Very often, upon arrival in the United States many foreign visitors are astonished by the warmth and friendliness of the American people. But often after a few months they begin to feel homesick and lonely, and they blame the Americans for causing these feelings by being cold. Now, why is this? I believe it is simply a question of different rhythms.Americans have one rhythm in their personal and family relations, in their friendliness and their charities. People from other cultures have different rhythms. The American rhythm is fast. It is characterized by a rapid acceptance of others. However, it is seldom that Americans engage themselves entirely in a friendship. Their friendships are warm, but they are casual and they are specialized. By specialized I mean, for example, you have a neighbor who drops by in the morning for coffee. You see her frequently, but you never invite her for dinner not because you dont think she could handle a fork and a knife, but because you have seen her that morning. Therefore, you reserve your more formal invitation to dinner for someone who lives in a more distant part of the city and whom you would not see unless you extended an invitation for a special occasion. Now, if the first friend moves away and the second one moves nearby, you are likely to reverse this see the second friend in the mornings for informal coffee meetings, and the first one more formally for dinner.In some cultures friendship means a strong life-long bond between two people. In these cultures friendships develop slowly, since they are built to last. But people in American society seem to be much more mobile. Studies show that one out of five American families moves every year. Therefore American friendships develop quickly, and they may change just as quickly.Besides, people are, in other words