2009福建省高考英语书面表达高二英语备课组1最开放的命题 最有话可说 最深刻的寓意 最完美的结合（内容与形式）2009书面表达命题特点（新课程）2试题分析1.提示形式：思路图 2.体裁：议论文、记叙文不限 3.四个要点： 1）微笑的好处 2）对父母或对朋友微笑及原因 3）对自己微笑及原因 4）总结 4. 人称：以第一人称为主 5.时态：现在时；过去时+现在时3内容要点以及语言结构 1.说明“the advantage of smiles”可写两点以上 Smiling can cut down the distance between you and the other people. Smiling can make us cheerful/keep us young. Smiling will clear up misunderstanding/difficulties. Smiling can help us to relax/to forget our worries and enjoy ourselves/ to escape the pressure. 2. 对父母、朋友微笑可用实际事例说明why ,以表感恩 之心。 3.对自己微笑，用实际事例说明why. 4.总结：一句话即可（一两句也可）In a word, we can smile as often as possible to make our life colorful.4数据分析：08、09年高考书面表达得分情况 年份第五档 （21-25）第四档 (1620)第三档 （11-15）第二档 （6-10）第一档 （1-5）0分08年6.1850.7824.376.266.58 5.49%09年348%423%3178%8%857% 579%“三率”及标准差年份平均分及格率优秀率标准差0814.27 66.96%12.28% 5.690913315737%688%5735三、存在问题分析 错误类型典型错误案例审题不清 要点不全1.把smile at my parents 写成my parents like smiling 2.文章要求4个方面, 很多学生只局限于 advantages of smiling，遗遗漏了其它要点 。 3.有的学生甚至写我父母或朋友或我喜欢欢微 笑。My parents prefer to smile because smiling is friendly. Certainly we can get along with others with smiling. So my parents love smiling. 4. 有的学生没有注意“parents or friends” 中的“or”等。6错误类型典型错误案例成分残缺 缺乏完整句子没有谓语，有的没有主语或宾语等。1）If I happy, I smile; 2）They give me help when I in trouble.只有枝干 没有血肉有的学生只写零星要点，而没有进行有效 拓展。例如，针对advantage(s)只写There are advantages of smiling. It benefits us a lot. It plays a very important part in our life.表面 上看起来很漂亮，其实没有实质性的内容。 几个形容词 “happy、beautiful、 confident” 从头到尾不断重复使用，空洞 乏味。（too general, not specific）7错误类型典型错误案例搭配不当 引起歧义1.将be good to误误用为为be good for。 2. 欲表达“In a word, smiling is good for us.”结结果写成“In a word, smiling is good to us.” “be good for sb”是“do good to” 是 “对某人有好处”的意思，然而“be good to sb”的意思是“对友善”。 词类不分 意义模糊1. 代词的使用混乱 2. 名词形容词不分现象严重。1）Because a smile have many available to you body and you healthy；2) Because smile can make you more confidence, I know I can get over the difficult.8错误类型典型错误案例缺乏一致 结构混乱很多学生的文章结构零散，有的时态与信息要求不一 致;有的主谓不一致，例如，I will smile with my parents when they was tired in works.缺乏连词 结构松散忽视了语篇的衔接语连贯，整篇文章没有使用 任何连词。 滥用从句 晦涩难懂有的学生在一段话就用了十分累赘的4个定语 从句。书写潦草 不知所云有的学生做题规范较差，字迹潦草，影响了信 息的传递，评卷老师评分很费力。 （评卷老师很生气，后果很严重。） 语言冗长 偏离主题允许紧扣主题适当发挥，但不能随意发挥。过 于随意发挥，有画蛇添足之感。9亮点（开头、推展句及结尾 ） 1. 1. 开头引人入胜，扣人心弦开头引人入胜，扣人心弦 1) 1) 引用谚语式引用谚语式As an old saying goes, a smile makes a As an old saying goes, a smile makes a young man. young man.There is an old saying goes, youll be young There is an old saying goes, youll be young if you always smile. if you always smile. 2) 2) 疑问式疑问式Do you think a smile will make people Do you think a smile will make people beautiful? beautiful?Would you like to smile? As we all know, we Would you like to smile? As we all know, we can benefit from smile a lot. can benefit from smile a lot.10 3) 3) 概括式概括式 As we know, smiling is good for our As we know, smiling is good for our health.health. Its universally acknowledged that smiling Its universally acknowledged that smiling is of great benefit to our daily life. is of great benefit to our daily life. 4 4）例例举举举举式式 There are many advantages of smiling. There are many advantages of smiling. For instance, smiling can help me to have For instance, smiling can help me to have a happy feeling. a happy feeling. It is good for us to smile. For example, It is good for us to smile. For example, smiling can release the pressure from smiling can release the pressure from study and life, which helps us.study and life, which helps us.11亮点（开头、推展句及结尾）2. 推展句内容丰富，行文连贯1) I often smile at my parents or friends sincerely because I want to express my love and appreciation to them. Without their care and help, I would not have a good life. Whats more. 2) In our daily life, we should smile at our parents to let them know we are in good condition. Besides, we should also smile at our friends, which will make them feel that they are treasured as well as trusted. 3) Besides, I always smile at myself. To be honest, smiling at myself can encourage myself greatly. 12亮点（开头、推展句及结尾）3. 结尾隽秀有力，耐人寻味 1）总结式 In a word, Im looking forward to joining your club to realize my dream : passing my smile to everywhere on earth!In a word, I want to smile. Only in this way can I lead a more wonderful life. 2) 重申观点强调式In a word, a smile is a bridge of understanding between others and me. So I want to smile.133）排比式In a word, a smile can bring happiness to me； a smile can make me grow healthier. So I want to smile. 4）建议式In a word, I want to smile. My fellow students, take action please.So why not smile at everyone around?Why not smile today?Remember to smile no matter what happens.If everyone smiles at others, our world will be a much better one.14书面表达高分秘诀： 1. 要点齐全，中心突出。 2词汇高级，使用恰当。使用了下列句子划线部分等较为高级的词汇：1) I owe my gratitude to my parents and friends.2) I smile at myself for the purpose of making myself feel confiden