Thinking Differently About Difficult People,Dewoun M. Hayes, CAP Elite Office Concepts, Inc.,1,2,Who? What? Why? How?,Who are “difficult” people?,3,Values/Beliefs Perceptions Background,What makes us different?,DIVERSITY!,4,Prefrontal Cortex,Deep Limbic System,Basal Ganglia,Cingulate,5,The “Physio-factors”,6,Basal Ganglia - “speedometer” Functions,Regulates feelings/emotions Regulates motivation Monitors bodys anxiety levels,7,Basal Ganglia - “speedometer” Hyperactivity,Panic attacks “Negaholics” Low motivation Conflict avoidance Unable to handle stress Nervousness,8,Cingulate - “gear shifter” Functions,Ability to adapt to situations Provides cognitive flexibility Ability to see options Ability to shift attention,9,Cingulate - “gear shifter” Hyperactive Mode,Uncooperative the instant “NO” Argumentative Unable to adapt to change The perfectionist Grudge holders Worry warts,10,Sets emotional tone Modulates motivation Promotes bonding Stores emotional memories Identifies important events,11,Deep Limbic System - Hyperactive Mode,Moody Negative thinking Decreased motivation Social isolation Not admitting fault,12,Pre-Frontal Cortex “Supervisor” Functions,Attention span Critical thinking Impulse control Judgment Learn from experience Problem solving organization,13,Pre-Frontal Cortex - Hyperactivity,Disorganization Procrastinators Poor judgment calls Short term memory issues unable to learn from mistakes,Options?,14,Option #1: I QUIT!,15,UNEMPLOYED!,16,17,Option #2: Knock Some Sense Into Them,She will go away soon!,She will go away soon!,Option #3 - Ignore,18,Option #4: Change YOUR ATTITUDE!,“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.“ Sir Winston Churchill,19,Productive,Less Stress,Professionalism,=YOU!,20,Acknowledge Accept Approach,21,The Steps to Attitude Adjustment,I cannot change anyones personality, but I can change MY attitude!,I cannot change anyones personality, but I can change MY attitude!,I cannot change anyones personality, but I can change MY attitude!,22,Step #1: Acknowledge,23,Step #2: Acceptance,Acceptance is when a person agrees to experience a situation, to follow a process or condition,I am ok with who you are,Dont take it personal!,99.5% of the time its NOT about YOU!,24,Step#3: The Approach,25,26,Create an internal agenda!,Identify a reason to interact with this individual Determine a benefit of the interaction Make it work to your advantage Keep it short and simple!,27,Devise a solution!,28,I need to communicate differently.,Adjust your communication,Alter current communication method Use active listening skills Change level of communication,Putting our attitude adjustment to use,Micromanager “Negaholic” Unorganized/Procrastinator Non-communicative Boss Office Gossip The Perfectionist,29,Acknowledge Accept Approach = Changed Attitude,“A” CHECKLIST,30,Harmonious, Diverse Workplace,31,Dewoun M. Hayes, CAP worklifecoachexcite.com Visit the: Office Professionals Place Blog,32,