高中英语复习 写作讲评课 Assessment & practice of Writing,2008年奥运会刚刚落幕，一家英文报刊在其网站上征集奥运会后如何综合利用体育场馆的建议。假设你叫李华，是该报的一名读者，请给该报编辑部写一封信，谈谈你的建议和理由 内容包括： 向公众开放，用于健身 租给体育公司，创造经济效益 开辟成旅游景点，吸引游客 Dear editor, I am Li Hua, a reader of your paper. ,评分的四大纬度,内容,语法,思想,框架-组织结构,要点全，拓展有度，有效,连接词，作文结构紧凑；流畅,准确，复杂语法结构，高级词汇，多种句型,开放能引起读者的共鸣,灵魂,常见错误:,1.单词拼写或用错：,Give you some advise I just provide you my own suggests. They can attact visitors.,advice,suggestion,attract,问题:,2.时态语态问题 We may given it to the PE company. We may give it to the PE company 3. 主谓一致问题 The sport stadiums is very great and is highly spoken of by the foreigners. The sport stadiums are very great and are highly spoken of by the foreigners.,4. 逐字翻译问题 The stadiums can open to people for do exercise use. The stadiums can be opened to people for doing exercises.,问题:,5. 词性混淆问题 It can creative money It can create/bring in money. Many people can use them to strong our body. Many people can use them to strengthen our body. 6. 介词短语的运用问题 I am writing to make some advice for how to make full use of the sports stadium. I am writing to make some advice on how to make full use of the sports stadium.,问题:,句子结构不完整 Only make full use of them does it make sense . Only by making full use of them does it make sense The 29th Olympic Games which hosted in Beijing were held successfully. The 29th Olympic Games which were hosted in Beijing were held successfully.,1. 审题 2. 列提纲/要点 3.连词成句 4.连句成篇 5. 润色修正 6. 定稿,写作步骤:,体裁 时态 结构 要求,字数 内容,信息2 信息3 信息4,开头 正文 结尾,1.审题:,体裁 人称 时态 要求 结构,字数 内容,一般现在时,Para.1 Para.2 Para.3,抓要点, 120个左右,信息1,信息5,08年奥运会刚刚落幕. 征集奥运会后如何综合利用体育场馆的建议. 你想写一些建议.,向公众开放，用于健身,总结，意愿,书信格式,租给体育公司，创造经济效益,开辟成旅游景点，吸引游客,第一,三人称,08年奥运会刚刚落幕. 征集奥运会后如何综合利用体育场馆的建议. 你想写一些建议,2.列提纲/要点,开头信息1,08年奥运会刚刚落幕. 征集奥运会后如何综合利用体育场馆的建议. 你想写一些建议.,.,Want to write some advice/Would like to give you some advice Contribute some suggestions to you.,Collect some advice How to use/make use of /make the best of the stadiums. After the Olympic Games After Beijing hosted the 29th Olympic Games .,The 2008 Beijing Olympic/ were over/finished/held successfully in Beijing.,向公众开放，用于健身. 租给体育公司，创造经济效益. 开辟成旅游景点，吸引游客,2.列提纲/要点,.,Use it as/be used for/as; take it as; open it for Places of interest/tourist attractions Attract tourists/appeal to visitors/ be attraction for visitors,Give to/Rentto/be rented to Sport company/companies which organize matches/organizing matches Make/ create money; bring in money/make more profits,Open/be opened to the people/public/open them to public. Be used for/as; be made to; Do some exercise/build our bodies/strengthen our bodies,信息2 信息3 信息4,向公众开放，用于健身,租给体育公司，创造经济效益,开辟成旅游景点，吸引游客,正 文,2.列提纲/要点,.,信息5,总结，意愿,结尾,In my opinion/ as far as I am concerned/from my point of view. I would appreciate I would you will think of /takeinto consideration.,开头信息1,08年奥运会刚刚落幕. 征集奥运会后如何综合利用体育场馆的建议. 你想写一些建议.,.,3.连词成句,The 2008 Beijing Olympic Games were over/finished. The 29th Olympic Games were held successfully in Beijing. Beijing hosted the 29th Olympic Games with a great success.,The 29th Olympic Games were hosted in Beijing with a great success. Beijing achieved its dream of hosting the 29th Olympic Games successfully.,Collect some advice How to use/make use of /make the best of the stadiums. After the Olympic Games After Beijing hosted the 29th Olympic Games .,You are collecting some advice on how to make use of the stadiums after Beijing hosted the 29th Olympic Games . I hear you are collecting some advice on how to make the best of the stadiums after Beijing hosted the 29th Olympic Games successfully.,Want to write some advice/Would like to give you some advice Contribute some suggestions to you.,I would like to give you some advice. I would like to contribute the following suggestions to you,4.Use it as/be used for/as;take it as;open it for Places of interests/tourist attractions Attract tourists/appeal to visitors/ be attraction for visitors,3.Give to/Rentto/be rented to Sport company/companies which organize matches/organizing matches Make/create money; bring in money/make more profits,信息2 信息3 信息4,向公众开放，用于健身,租给体育公司，创造经济效益,开辟成旅游景点，吸引游客,正 文,3.连词成句,2.Open/be opened to the people/public/open them to public. Be used for/as; be made to; Do some exercise/build our body/strengthen our bodies,2.The stadiums can be opened to the public. The public can build their bodies/strengthen their bodies,3.The stadiums can be rented to sport company which organize matches. It can bring in more money/make more profits,4.They can be used as tourist attraction. It can attract many visitors.,.,信息5,总结，意愿,结尾,In my opinion/ as far as I am concerned/from my point of view. I would appreciate I would you will think of /takeinto consideration. In a word,3.连词成句,From my point of view, we should do what we can to make full use of the stadium. I would appreciate it if you would take my advice into