Part 1 Chapter 13Open-work StockingsA novel is a mirror taken along a road.SAINT-REALWhen Julien caught sight of the picturesque ruins of the old church ofVergy, it occurred to him that for two whole days he had not oncethought of Madame de Renal. The other day, as I was leaving, that womanreminded meof the vast gulf that separates us, she treated melike aworkmans son. No doubt she wished to show me that she repented ofhaving let mehold her hand the ni ght beforeIt is a lovely hand, allthe same! What charm, what nobility dwells in that womansglance!The possibility of making a fortune with Fouque gave a certain facilityto the course of Juliens reasoning; it wasless often interrupted by irritation, and the keen sense of his own poverty and humble position in theeyes of the world. As though perched on a lofty promontory, he was ableto judge, and, so to speak, overlooked extreme poverty on the one handand thatlife of comfort which he still called riches on the other. He wasfar from considering his position like a philosopher, but he had sufficientperception to feel that he was different after this little expedition amongthe mountains.He was struck by the extreme uneasiness with which Madame de Renal listened to the short account of his journey, for which she had askedhim.Fouque had had thoughts of marriage, unhappy love affairs;the conversation between the friends had been filled with longconfidences ofthis nature. After finding happiness too soon,Fouque had discoveredthat he was not the sole possessor of his mistresss heart. These disclosures had astonished Julien; he had learned much that was new to him.His solitary life, compoundedof imagination and suspicion, had kepthim aloof from everything that could have enlightened him.During his absence, life had been for Madame de Renal nothing morethan a succession of torments, each different but all alike intolerable; shewas really ill.You must not, on any account, Madame Derville told her when shesaw Julien return, feeling as you do, sit in the garden this evening, thedamp air would make you worse.Madame Derville was surprised to see that her friend, who was always being scolded by M. de Renal for the undue simplicityof her attire,had put on open-work stockings and a pair of charming little shoes thathad arrived from Paris. For the last three days Madame de Renals soledistraction had been to cut out and make Elisa put together in all haste asummer gown, of a charming little fabric greatly in fashion. It was justpossible to finish this gown a few minutes after Juliens arrival; Madamede Renal at once put it on. Her friend had no longer any doubt.She is in love, poor woman! Madame Derville said to herself. She understood all the strange symptomsof her illness.She saw her speak to Julien. Pallor took the place of the most vividblushes. Anxiety stood revealed in her eyes, fastened on those of theyoung tutor. Madame de Renal expected everymomentthat he was going to offer an explanation, and announce that he wasleaving the house,or would remain. It never occurred to Julien to say anything about thissubject, which had not entered his thoughts. After a terrible struggle,Madame de Renal at last ventured to say to him, in a tremulous voice, inwhich the whole extent of her passion lay revealed:Are you going to leave your pupils to take a post elsewhere?Julien was struck by her quavering voice and by the look in her eyes.This womanloves me, he said to himself; but after this passing weakness for which her pride is reproaching her, and as soon as she is nolonger afraid of my going, she will return to her arrogance. This glimpseof their respective positions came to Julien like a flash of lightning; hereplied, hesitatingly:I should greatly regret leaving such attractive andwell-born children,but perhaps it will be inevitable.A manhas duties towards himself also.As he uttered the words well born (this was one of the aristocratic expressions which Julien had recently acquired), he burned with a strongfeeling of antipathy.To this woman, he said to himself, I am not well born.Madamede Renal, as she listened to him, was admiring his intelligence, his beauty, her heart was pierced by the possibility of departurewhich he dangled before her. All her friends from Verrieres who, duringJuliens absence, had come out to dine at Vergy, had almost vied in complimenting her upon the astonishing young man that her husband hadhad the good fortune to unearth. This was not to say that they understood anything of the progress that the children had made. The fact ofhis knowing the Bible by heart, and in Latin, too, had provoked in the inhabitants of Verrieres an admiration that will endure for, it may be, acentury.Julien, who spoke to no one, knew nothing of all this. IfMadame deRenal had had the slightest self-control, she would have congratulatedhim on the reputation he had won, and Julien, his pride set at rest