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眼线,发了一篇英文版的,我想试一下,能不能翻成中文,每天翻一部分 Simplicity & Clutter 怎样把文章写的简洁 Style 风格 只有把“人”写出来,才会有自己的风格 The audience 你的文章为谁而写 Words 措辞 怎样的用词会把你的文章搞坏,什么又是好的措辞 Unity 整体性 如何写出牛逼的开头和结尾,怎么寻找素材 Bits & Pieces 动词,副词,形容词,缩写,that/which等等用法 1. Simplicity & Clutter 简洁与繁琐 Clutter is the disease of American writing. We are a society strangling in unnecessary words, circular constructions, pompous frills and meaningless jargon. 繁琐是英文写作的通病。在我们生活中,多余的文字,拐弯抹角的句子,华而不实的修饰,和无意义的套话,随处看见。 Fighting clutter is like fighting weedsthe writer is always slightly behind. New varieties sprout overnight, and by noon they are part of American speech. Consider what President Nixons aide John Dean accomplished in just one day of testimony on television during the Watergate hearings. The next day everyone in America was saying at this point in time instead of now. 去掉语言中的繁琐,就像除草一样繁琐,就像杂草,总是隐藏着的,会在一夜之间发芽,第二天变成全国的口头禅。就像,水门事件的听证会上,美国尼克松总统的助手,使用的语言。第二天,全美国,都在说,“at this point in time” 而不是“now”。 Take the adjective “personal,” as in “a personal friend of mine,” “his personal feeling.” Its typical of hundreds of words that can be eliminated. The personal friend has come into the language to distinguish him or her from the business friend, thereby debasing both language and friendship. Someones feeling is that persons personal feelingthats what “his” means. Friends are friends, the rest is clutter. 再如,“a personal friend of mine”中的“personal”,“his personal feeling”中的“personal”,很多类似这样的词,都可以去掉。“personal friend”,这种说法,可以用来区别商业伙伴,表示友谊的深浅。有些人感觉,“his personal feeling”里,“personal”和“his”重复了。还有,朋友就是朋友,其他的修饰,都是多余。 Clutter is the ponderous euphemism that turns a slum into a depressed socioeconomic area, garbage collectors into waste disposal personnel and the town dump into the volume reduction unit. 繁琐,就是指冗长委婉的说法。例如,把贫民窟,说成经济落后地区;把收垃圾的,说成废物处理人员;把垃圾倾倒处,说成废物分解中心。 Clutter is the official language used by corporations to hide their mistakes. When General Motors had a plant shutdown, that was a “volume-related production-schedule adjustment.” When an Air Force missile crashed, it “impacted with the ground prematurely.” Companies that go belly-up have “a negative cash-flow position.” 繁琐,是一种官方语言,商业上,可以用来掩盖错误,当通用公司关闭其工厂时,会说“生产规模方面,有计划的调整”;当空军导弹坠毁时,会说“提前着陆”;当公司破产时,会说“面临负面现金流” “Experiencing” is one of the worst clutters. Instead of “it is raining”, there is no way to say “At the present time we are experiencing precipitation.” Even your dentist will ask if you are experiencing any pain. If he had his own kid in the chair he would say,” Does it hurt?” “experiencing”是一种用法最繁琐的词。例如,“在下雨”,会说成“在此时此刻,我们正在经历一场降水”;你的牙医会问,“是否经历过疼痛的体验”。如果他问自己的孩子,他会说“疼不疼”。 The point of raising these examples is to serve notice that clutter is the enemy. Beware, then, of the long word thats no better than the short word: assistance(help), numerous (many), facilitate (ease), individual(man or woman), remainder (rest), initial (first), implement(do), sufficient (enough), attempt (try), referred to as(called) and hundreds more. Beware of all the slippery new fad words: paradigm and parameter, prioritize and potentialize. They are all weeds that will smother what you write. 举这些例子,是让大家注意,繁琐是写作的大敌。然后注意,简单简短的词,比复杂冗长的词好,比如:assistance(help), numerous (many), facilitate (ease), individual(man or woman), remainder (rest), initial (first), implement(do), sufficient (enough), attempt (try), referred to as(called) and hundreds more. 注意那些时尚的词,他们都是杂草,对你的写作不利 How can the rest of us achieve such enviable freedom from clutter? The answer is to clear our heads of clutter. Clear thinking becomes clear writing; one cant exist without the other. Itsimpossible for a muddy thinker to write good English. He may get away with it for a paragraph or two, but soon the reader will be lost, and theres no sin so grave, for the reader will not easily be lured back. 如何做到写作不繁琐呢?方法是去掉繁琐的词。思路清晰,才能写作清晰;两者相辅相成。一个脑子里乱糟糟的人,不可能写出好文章。他的文章,会偶尔清晰,但是,读者很快会迷失,没有比这更糟的了,因为读者会误入歧途。作者的一个tip,“括号剔除法”.经我的PS测试,发现非常好用。 Is there any way to recognize clutter at a glance? Heres a device my students at Yale found helpful. I would put brackets around every component in a piece of writing that wasnt doing useful work. Often just one word got bracketed: the unnecessary preposition appended to a verb (order up), or the adverb that carries the same meaning as the verb (smile happily), or the adjective that states a known fact (tall skyscraper). Often my brackets surrounded the little qualifiers that weaken any sentence they inhabit (a bit, sort of), or phrases like in a sense, which dont mean anything. Sometimes my brackets surrounded an entire sentencethe one that essentially repeats what the previous sentence said, or that says something readers dont need to know or can figure out for themselves. Most first drafts can be cut by 50 percent without losing any information or losing the authors voice. 有没有办法,找出繁琐的地方呢?
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