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法学院申请文章个人特质 Praise The below edit and critique earned this comment from the customer: I just received and read your editing of my personal statement. What an incredibly talented job you did on my essay. I cannot say thank you enough. It far exceeded any expectations I had and I really wanted to let you know right away my appreciation and gratitude. I love the smoothing and clarity you added to my work. It is now really interesting to read the essay, even to myself and I already know what it says! I dont know if you normally work on the weekends (we do), but I was floored to see it in my email today. I will look it over more carefully when I come down off my cloud 9 feeling. If there are any changes I want to make, I will certainly work with you so I can keep the impact this essay makes. Unedited Version: In life, accomplishments of goals drive us to excel. Practicing law is a very important stepping stone to fulfilling my aspirations. Being raised in an environment conducive to team work, my parents instilled in me the conviction to lead. This conviction has carried me from elementary school through my collegiate career. Practicing law is a very integral part in accomplishing my life long goal of being a great civil servant. From the first day I could remember, I knew my life was headed in a direction to help others. My parents raised me with a gift to care and touch the lives of people around me. The first ever honor I received came in second grade. Mrs. XXX presented me with an award at the end of the school year. I received the, Most Likely to be a Peace Maker, award. When I wonder where my life is headed, and I question my goals, my mother always seems to point to this event. She, undoubtedly, knows that I will one day be a Peace Maker, somewhere, and somehow. Through high school, and college I searched for my identity. I looked at many possible career paths that matched my personality. The only answer I would always come to was law. My dream is to one day make a significant impact on our society. A vast majority of Florida and United States congressmen are lawyers. Law School is without doubt the path which will lead me to my calling. I plan to one day touch the lives of as many people as God has planned. He has molded me into an individual who cares mostly about his surroundings. This conviction is deep rooted in my everyday routine, and my overall life. Day to day, I have a burning desire to impact others. It all began around the beginning my sophomore year in high school, I found a niche with my fellow students. I began serving in student government as the voice of my constituents. As time progressed, I felt more comfortable with stepping outside of the box. I realized that God had given a gift to speak, and touch lives in a very positive way. In May of my sophomore year, I attended the Hugh OBrien Youth Seminar. This weekend-long leadership program focused my attention to excel in society. It taught me how to think, not what to think. I quickly realized the difference I could make in my world. From that short weekend forth, my life changed ically. The leadership conference put new and unique tools in my hands and then immediately put me in an environment to use these new tools through the whole weekend. I was awakened to new ways of doing things that resulted in immediate results in interaction with my fellow peers. I began to search for answers and I was hungry for more of these kind of tools. Law school became a clearer and stronger goal. Through high school, and well into college, I was finding myself. I embarked on numerous extracurricular activities including presiding over the Greek and American Student Association, partaking in the Hugh OBrien Youth State executive Board, and coaching various volleyball teams in the Gainesville area, all while holding down a full time job at the Home Depot, and attending the University of Florida. During the 2000 Jr. Olympic Volleyball National Championships in Kentucky, I realized the fruits of my labor. The eleven fourteen-year-old girls on my team brought me a great sense of accomplishment. Through the year, sixteen-hundred teams competed to enter this tournament, and sixty-four were invited. Being a small town of population less then three-hundred thousand, we somehow managed to compile a team that finished ninth in the nation. When the last ball hit the floor, I looked up and wondered why God had given me such an honor. It was clearly one of the greatest moments of my life. The lesson learned was a great one. I realized that my ability to motivate others pays off. Law will definitely lead me down the path where I can continue finding these opportunities. At first, I may be helping one person at a time. As my aspirations become reality, I wish to be impacting whole cities or states. I believe that God has blessed me with these kinds of experiences. 温馨提示:专业的事情,交给专业的机构来完成。10年来,监审留学一直致力于留学文书的写作服务,已经帮助过无数留学生申请到理想的大学,擅长美国,加拿大,
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